3 posts tagged “biyuuden”

Okay, so I watched the regular version of "Jaja Uma Paradise", and to my surprise, it was even more boobtastic than the Pink Version. (Am I the only one that thinks it's funny that it's called the Pink Version when you think about the Japanese and the color pink? Okay, I'm done making dirty commentary. For now.)

Actually, I think it's hilarious that "Jaja Uma Paradise" roughly translates to "Shrew Paradise" (shrew meaning difficult woman) and I just got finished doing tech for a play called "Taming of the Shrew". I'm sure I could make plenty of jokes within this entry using lines from it, but I'll refrain. Unless one of these screencaps just begs for a quote about tongues and tails. Okay. I'm done now, I swear.

The song is starting to grow on me, though I'd still gladly one-two-three KICK (yes, that was a bad pun. I'm really sorry) it out the window for another "Ajisai" or "Kacchoiize." Though I do confess to running around all day going "Odore! Koisuru no rodeo danshi!"

What I don't like is how they're trying so hard to make the girls sexy and while they do succeed to an extent, I kind of laugh watching this. Rika doesn't look very good in that high ponytail; though Yui and Erika are gorgeous. The dance is laughable, especially the part where they wave their arms above their heads. I mean, come on. I found out Natsu Mayumi does the AKB48 choreography...and they have such awesome choreography. What the fuck happened here?

And even MORE blatant boob shots. That said, I kind of like the glittery thing on Rika's right boob. Now, if only it was somewhere else so I wouldn't have to look at Rika's goodies while I go, "OOOH, SHINY!"

The video only makes more obvious how desperate Biyuuden's situation is: come on, Goto Maki did this exact same kind of thing, and she graduated. But what can Rika do? H!P is really the only place where she can take the front and center like this, so she and the rest of Biyuuden have to dance there and look overjoyed at thrusting while wearing hardly anything. Very flattering.

Rika tries to look alluring. She fails. Well, I think she does, anyway. The legions of nosebleeding fanboys might disagree.

If anything, this pretty much shows you everything that's wrong with Biyuuden: their sexiness isn't at all classy, and while Erika and Yui are decent singers...those "dangerous" and "fantasy" parts were almost painful to listen to, and because of all this, they have to stand there and look absolutely fucking thrilled to be doing this.

Forgive me, but I just can't believe that this is what any of them thought they'd signed on for. Not even Rika.

Also, I was watching a subbed version, and does anyone want to update me on what "Taro and Hanako" is? They mention things like "otoko to onna" and "Adam and Eve" (well, really "Ivuko", but whatever) so I'm assuming they're like a traditional symbolic Japanese pairing (you know, like Adam and Eve is for some of us, or Han Solo and Princess Leia...well, the second one might just be me.)

Oh, Yui. Yui, Yui, Yui. There are no words to express my love for her.

Erika spends a lot of this video looking off into space. One can argue that this was thought up by the director to enhance the boobage, but I had more fun saying things like, "What's that in the distance? Is it Max Matsuura, coming to sign me to Avex and let me put my clothes back on?"

And hey, speaking of the clothes, does anyone know why there's a dead skunk hanging off their skirts?

Actually, other than the dead skunks and the disturbing amount of cleavage, I kinda like the outfits. The skirts are flashy at least, and if they make the shirt longer and less prone to smashing boobs together, I might actually wear that.

Might being the key word.

I saw this mentioned over at Thoughts on Jpop about the choreography, and looking at it when it's screencapped, there are points when they seem rather out of sync. I didn't notice it in the video, more likely because I was constantly pausing it and minimizing the window every time a family member walked by.
 

That said, it doesn't really matter, because I hate this choreography. The part where they're high-fiving each other, Rika looks partly "Must keep smiling" and partly "Dear God, please let my hand reach Yui's" since she's not looking.

Erika's hair apparently is not long, but it still looks pretty good. I miss her "Koisuru Angel Heart" hair, though. That was beautiful.

All insults aside, though, they do look quite pretty. Yui especially. I think they overdid Erika's eyeliner, though. She looks like a raccoon.

You know, this PV looks like it was fairly budgeted. Certainly there are more than two sets, two versions, and confetti flying everywhere. I think Coconuts Crazy was right about Up-Front using most of its money to sex up poor Gocchin.

"Shake it, do it, do it!"

For a few moments here, the Biyuuden girls are rendered blurry with happiness. Or the crazy horny camera guy just can't hold it still. Something.

Rika looks very satisfied here. Turning on wotas and freaking casual listeners out. All in a day's work.

I've never liked the idea of Biyuuden much ("Let's take one of H!P's worst singers and toss in two others to make it less obvious! YEAH!") but they always managed to make it worthwhile. "Ajisai" was lovely and didn't even try to sex the girls up too much (though I agree with Ray that Erika shaking it was probably the most unintentionally sexy moment of the PV) while "Kacchoiize!", while not exactly as complex as "Ajisai", was at least interesting (lesbian love triangles, anyone?) and there wasn't a part of either song that I flinched at.

I know I keep comparing everything Biyuuden does to "Ajisai" and "Kacchoiize!" but for me, those are their two best songs ("Koisuru Angel Heart" gave me hope for their newer stuff, but "Jaja Uma Paradise" crushed it again). I also really liked "Koi no Nukegara", and that PV was absolutely beautiful, with the traditional Japanese...stuff (haha, I don't know the right word for it)...and the dresses and those little sprigs of whatever that is in their hair...

And it's not like this is Morning Musume, with their ever-changing lineup and the styles that change from lineup to lineup (example: fourth-gen 10nin did happy happy pop; fifth-gen 13nin and 12nin did more experimental things like "Mr. Moonlight" [swing] and "Souda!" [which I don't think I can even begin to categorize])...this is one group. If Tsunku and his creative forces can write things like "Kacchoiize!" and "Koisuru" (I don't believe he did "Koi no Nukegara" or "Ajisai"), or at least hire people to think up things like "Koi no Nukegara" and "Ajisai", why doesn't Biyuuden put out better stuff? You're obviously going to have good songs and bad songs, but from "Kacchoiize!" to something like "Issai Gassai"? I don't see it. Sorry.

Anyway. Where was I before I went off rambling? Right. Biyuuden started out good, and they've had spikes of improvement ("Aisucream" and "Koisuru" come to mind) but then they come out with something like "Jaja Uma", which is catchy, yes, but it's catchy like that song you completely hate is catchy. It doesn't fit with Biyuuden's usual level of music.

Normally I'd close this off with some advice, but there's really nothing I can say. Um, at least they're hot? Something anyway.

Well, apparently since Goto Maki discovered this beautiful thing called "classy sexy", Biyuuden has decided to take up her "slutty sexy" mantle. As a matter of fact, if they sold higher, they could be the trio equivalent of Koda Kumi. To quote this random TV show I saw once: "Wear a bra...for the good of the country!"

Okay, fine. "Jaja Uma Paradise" is their newest single, though if you take the cover, the PV, and Biyuuden's tendency to flaunt their assets, you can see how I came to this conclusion, can't you? Particularly after seeing the pole-dancing on the back of the single. Whatever.

Anyway. For some unknown reason, the girls sing in this whispery, whiny kind of voice that makes me want to just punch them in the face. Particularly Rika, whose voice was already all soft and whiny to begin with.

Erika, on the other hand, is totally gorgeous. I'm loving the long hair on her, though the way she's singing sounds a little too unnatural - like she's singing through a filter. Rika always sounds like this, but it sounds like Erika sang and then they put something over her voice. Still.

I'm pretty sure that her hair is just extensions, but I do hope she grows it out.

Yui's hair is also looking awesome, and I think she's my favorite Biyuuden member. She's not quite as good a singer as Erika, but she's definitely very quirky and odd, which is a breath of fresh air considering how all the girls seem to be taking the "kawaii" route.

The song's beginning reminds me a bit of "Balalaika", though of course after a while it segues into the rest of the song and the similarity pretty much ends. Biyuuden, even if I really don't think they work as a singing unit, definitely puts out some of the catchiest songs of the H!P crop, but this is just...strange.

It's kind of annoying how they throw in such blatant boob shots, and this is probably one of the two real reasons why I'm not fond of Biyuuden. Okay, so the girl with the most lines can't really sing, but she's got a major fanbase, so do you really have to throw in fanservice like that? It's a vicious wota-cycle: they need boob shots to sell singles, and wota will buy the single if it has boob shots and effectively scare the casual listeners away.

Screencapping this PV was kinda painful, because as H!P girls are wont to do, there were silly faces galore, and while this was somewhat endearing in the video, watching them frame by frame...

Well, you can see my point.

The girls dance around, seemingly unaware of the fact that the camera seems to alternate between shots of their boobs, and shots of their ass. Come on, the girls can do better than that. Well, Rika can't, but Erika and Yui can, anyway.

They seem to be acting out three roles: Erika relishes her moment as the diva, striking a pose and tossing her long hair. Certainly she deserves it, easily being the best singer of the trio. She mostly makes little "chu" faces at the camera, grinning and smiling. She doesn't need to do more: she believes herself to be the star, and her fabulous hair and not-heinous voice do all the work for her.

Rika seems to be...obnoxiously cute. Well, not really. While Erika is a diva, Rika seems to be just absolutely
ordinary, a girl living out her fantasy as someone cute and desirable to her bedroom mirror. In a way, that probably was Rika prior to winning the fourth gen audition. She pouts and flirts and does some exaggerated gestures we tend to associate with Japanese girls. This is further emphasized by the fact that her little pink-and-white underthings are very plain in comparison to the fancy little lace and patterns of Erika and Yui.

Yui...seems confused. Doesn't she always? She gives a goofy little grin and jumps up and down a little - probably the  only one of them in touch with the video's little reality.

The Biyuuden thing, actually, kind of reminds me of a book or a movie. Guy A has been best friends with Yui since they were kids, has a crush on Rika (who's...best friends with Erika? Something), and at the end of the book realizes that Rika's not the one for him, and HEY Yui actually hit puberty and he didn't notice, so they should be together. Or something.

Rika and Yui finally realize that they're prancing around in their undershirts and shorts and get some jackets. Such modesty is refreshing. Particularly after all the bunnygirl buttshaking of "Aisucream." Yui in particular seems to be going for a Ayu-from-JEWEL kind of look, though her hood isn't quite as big.

We then switch to another room, where Rika appears with...perfume? Makeup? One can't be sure.

Meanwhile, Yui tries on some jewelry, complete with an inconspicuous boob shot.

Erika, a little slow on the uptake, runs and tries on various things before deciding on a jacket.

I'm changing my mind about this video. It seems less about three separate girls (the diva, the wannabe, and the one just trying to enjoy her day) and more about the girls behind the scenes. Erika leaves herself alone for the most part. It's all her and it's all good. She doesn't need - or particularly want - to have her face caked with makeup, and standing behind Rika doesn't really require that much preparation anyway.

Rika, on the other hand, makes the video worth a fan's money with her little faces and peace signs. She needs to interact with the camera - it's her duty as the face of the group. Besides, a cute girl that can't sing but puts herself out there and works to interact with her fans is probably more easily forgiven than a cute girl that can't sing but doesn't bother to work her other, stronger points. And I do have to give Rika props for recognizing her weak voice and working her stronger points instead. She, out of all the H!P girls, probably has the best understanding of what she needs to do in order to hang on to her place in the idol world. Certainly this kind of careerist attitude seems to be missing in many other girls.

Though I still wonder why Biyuuden was created for her. Rika's voice is charming and markably improved, but it's still just not that great. I could see her hosting a show - radio or TV - with one of the less active H!P solo artists (Yuko is the most likely) as her foil. It'd be a bit of a recycle from HPN and "Charmy" Ishikawa, but considering how low Biyuuden sells, it seems a better idea than this tits-and-ass trap that Biyuuden seems caught in. Rika is simultaneously H!P's strongest and weakest link.

Yui, meanwhile, still doesn't seem to fit in very well with the group. The little love triangle from "Kacchoiize" seems to have carried over into their other work, because it seems more like "Erika and Rika with a side helping of Yui" than "Erika, Rika, and Yui in Biyuuden". She's my favorite member of this little trio, so that makes me sad, but it's true.

MOST BLATANT BOOB SHOT EVER. I know Yui's boobs are one of the few things she's got going for her, but couldn't she just shoot another photobook? It'd probably be a better book than Reina's "GIRL" (why the fuck do they keep reminding us that Reina's a girl? WE KNOW IT. I mean, seriously. "Shoujo R" and then "GIRL"?), since Reina...okay, I'll stop before I start ranting.

The funny thing is, I find myself setting very high standards where Biyuuden is concerned. I'm not fond of their voices, that is true, but the catchiness of the songs always manages to grab me and suck me in anyway. And Jaja Uma Paradise? Is not catchy at all. As a matter of fact, when I think about the beginning, in my head, it gets mixed up with "Odore! Morning Curry" and that's...not pleasant.

If anything, this PV is the most glaringly obvious example of the problem with Biyuuden: they are fanservice with very catchy songs...and that's it. Fanservice to who? Most likely the wota. I enjoy Biyuuden, yes - but I'm a girl, and seeing all that Yui boobage just makes me shake my head and pray that the next frame will have them wearing some clothes. (Those hopes are, of course, dashed.)

This single has left me feeling very disappointed in Tsunku and everyone else behind it. Biyuuden was not the best direction for Rika...or Erika and Yui, for that matter. But I'd overlook that if the song was good enough - and in the cases of "Kacchoiize! JAPAN", "Ajisai Ai Ai Monogatari", "Koisuru Angel Heart", even "Aisucream", the song was good enough. But here it's not, leaving Biyuuden with only their boobs and...er, poles.

"Seishun THE NIPPON" was also kind of disappointing. Better than "Jaja Uma Paradise" by a long shot...oh, but no, then they do this "SEISHUN THE NIPPON DA DA DA DA" chant...holy shit, now this is addictive. I will so be running around doing that all day. Still not what I'd call a satisfying B-side, but at least it's not getting mixed up with Morning Curry in my head.

Come on Biyuuden, I know that as long as you're not going to move on to doing something that entertains me, you can do better than this. I'm still praying for Rika and Yuko to get together and do another HPN, possibly with inappropriate jokes and yankii!Yuko.

But if that's not going to happen, I guess I'll settle for this.

I must admit that while I am not the greatest fan of Rika Ishikawa, I must profess to really like v-u-den/Viyuden/Biyuuden. I am in the habit of calling them v-u-den just because that was the first way I ever saw it romanized, but I'm pretty sure Biyuuden is the preferred spelling.

Tsunku really seems to be into the more rockish music these days. "Kanashimi" and now this. I really like "Koisuru Angel Heart"...perhaps not as much as "Kacchoiize" or "Aisucream" (so...catchy...) but it's really good.

One gripe I've always had with Rika's voice is that she seems to really be trying to put some oomph into it, but we never hear that oomph come out. All we hear is her trying. I commend her for realizing how soft her voice is and trying to make it a little more powerful, but I can practically hear her pushing her voice to be a little stronger...I just don't hear the actual push itself. Just her trying.

But maybe it's computer editing or the fact that Rika's voice is, like Sayu's, better suited to faster songs - their voices just don't hold up on slower songs, because those require dragging the notes out and their voices start to...falter. In any case, she sounds quite good here. Not as good as Erika or even Yui, but good enough. So good that I don't even really think, "Oh dear God, it's Rika singing now." 

The PV is pretty typical H!P. Why is the budget for groups like Berryz and Biyuuden PVs so high, and Momusu's so low? I loved "Kanashimi" and its simplicity was done very well - well enough that you began to feel that the simplicity was what really made the video. But come on. It was made on a low budget, much like "SEXY BOY" and "Iroppoi" and "Chokkan 2" (when you don't have money to spare on extra scenes, throw in some concert footage!).

"Koisuru Angel Heart" probably isn't the most expensive PV in Jpop history (yes, Ayu, I'm looking at you) but it certainly ranks up there in H!P PVs. Probably not anywhere near as high as "LOVE MACHINE", but in the current H!P state of affairs...well, anyway.

Basically, we get the Biyuuden girls in white angel costumes doing this very odd...clapping thing. Biyuuden always manages to confuse me with their choreography - they always get the strangest dances out of the H!P crop. Need I remind anyone of "Ajisai AI AI Monogatari"? Uh, yeah. Still, they look cute enough and they throw feathers and giggle while blowing the feathers every which way. Then we get to the Biyuuden girls wearing black dresses that are rather low-cut (Yui's is, as always, made to maximize cleavage in a way that is never given to Rika and Erika...sorry girls, better start eating that yogurt! Maybe Maki has some left over from her "Some Boys!" days) and their hair is done in that sloppy rock-chick thing that I can't think of a better name for. Angel!Biyuuden, meet...Devil!Biyuuden? I want to call them Dominatrix!Biyuuden, with all the boobage shown and that collar Erika's wearing, but it doesn't seem to fit. It's more, You-Know-You-Want-This!Biyuuden or Going-Out-For-Drinks-and-Sex!Biyuuden. Quite a change from the previous frame, which was Angel Heart!Biyuuden.

And seriously - Yui, please do not put your hair up. You and Miki both. Really, I know it must be more comfortable for her, but I was trying my best not to look at Miki's hair during the "Morning Curry!" concert.

While I'm on the subject of hair, I really think that all the girls have really nice hair when they're in their angel costumes. Erika's especially. I remember a point in time where she used to wear it really close to her head...um. Well. It could've been worse. But it looks really nice just sort of at her shoulders and loose like that.

Overall, this was actually pretty good. Biyuuden has this way of, even though I'm never impressed by the singing, putting out the damn catchiest singles that I just cannot get out of my head. And really. HIGHER BUDGET FOR MOMUSU PLZ.